Clauses to Give You Pauses

According to a study conducted at Oxford University and published in the book Damp Squid, the 10 most irritating phrases in the English language are (in order of most to least aggregious) are:

1 - At the end of the day
2 - Fairly unique
3 - I personally
4 - At this moment in time
5 - With all due respect
6 - Absolutely
7 - It's a nightmare
8 - Shouldn't of
9 - 24/7
10- It's not rocket science

Heading the list was the way-overused expression and very annoying 'at the end of the day'. I know an attorney that concludes every sentence he says with 'at the end of the day.' It's amazingly possible to end much of what with say with that phrase. Try it.

And for the 'fairly unique' talkers out there, I say make up your mind and take a stand!  It's either a fairly good approximation or actually is unique. Not both. Stop it! 

The absurdly redundant statement 'I personally' made third place. I think this is a favorite of Tom Cruz.  Personally who else could you be?  Following closely is the ubiquitous and really precise 'at this moment in time' phrase. What other dimension would a moment occur in?

It's followed in lessened annoyance order by the ingratiating and rather insulting 'with all due respect.' This one is in the Passive Aggressive Hall of Fame and is one you can brandish at work. However, overuse of it will certainly aggravate the target.

One of my own personal demons is 'absolutely' which I say WAY too much. Absolutely. And how many times can we hear and say 'It's a nightmare'? Time to wake up and lose that old chestnut before someone takes exception in a nightmarish way.

At number 8 we find the grammatically incorrect "shouldn't of", instead of "shouldn't have". To me, this seems put of place in this list of well worn offending cliched phrases. It's really just a grammatical error that is repeated over and over.

Bringing up the rear of the top 10 funky phrases are the fairly modern '24/7' and 'it's not rocket science'. The former still has some meaning -- as an way overused generalization while the later ought to be launched into deep space forever. Irritating for sure.

Perhaps the most disturbing element of this study is that anyone -- much less Oxford people -- would dedicate time and resources researching and publishing this stuff. To what end can studies like this lead to? You think someone might actually want to talk or write about this silly research anywhere? :-)

A few of my personal favorite overused cliches did not make the list and I would be remiss if I exclude them. So here goes.

Love you. Mean it. (said very quickly and insincerely of course)

Perfect storm. (Used anytime two or more variables can explain a stupid decision you made)

That 's amazing! (especially if we are easily amazed -- hyperbole at its finest)

Let's get together soon! (Soon as hell freezes over)

Not for nothing, but... (trying to figure out what this means makes my head hurt)

Got any overused phrases you care to share?

Fall Spectacular in New Jersey

I can't remember a more gorgeous fall in Central Jersey than this current edition. Here are some photos from around the neighborhood to prove my point.

Like most everything else when you get older, Autumn spurs many memories of years goes by -- some pleasant and some not so pleasant. And some are melancholy.

The last Autumn I remember so clearly that rivals the beauty of this year is 1989. This was the year of a big earthquake in San Francisco when highways buckled, buildings shook and a nation held its breath. This was the year that the Eastern Bloc Eurpoean countries began to break with the Soviet Union. This was the year that the Berlin Wall came down.

And this was the year that Kay, my beloved wife of 19 years and mother of Kris and Dave, passed away after a relatively short illness. Whether it really was a brilliant Autumn that year or perhaps it was just nature was "amplified" by the seeming disconnect with our lives and nature. If that makes any sense. This was a horrible but beautiful Fall.

1964 was one of the most pleasant of Autumns of 1964 went I entered Rutgers marked the beginning of major life changes for me.  Truly it was the Spring of my adulthood.

That same year I had a car and I was smitten with a girl -- we went to Rutgers football games  and life couldn't have been more sweet. The next year she and her family left the country and broke my tender little heart.  It was at that point that I started writing -- letters, poetry, stories.   I began then to realize what a release this would be over my lifetime.

The last photo above features our new Schnauzer -- Roxy.  

But enough about us.  How about your favorite Autumn story? Use the comments button below!

He Had A Dream

Why is this Election Day feel so different than any other?  

An African American is running for president and it looks like he will win. What a paradigm shift we’ve had.  The readers that are less than 40 years old may not truly appreciate the way it was.  Growing up, I recall my father (God rest his soul – he was a good man) complaining that there were too many black players on the Brooklyn Dodgers so he couldn’t root for them. Of course, he didn’t say “blacks.” And of course, being a rebellious youth, I embraced the Dodgers and have been a fan ever since.

The polling place was jammed with voters this morning. I’ve voted in the same place for 8 years now and I cannot recall such activity and buzz. While I was there I saw several people wandering about who obviously hadn’t voted before and didn’t know what to do. There was one mom was dragging three kids, an elderly Asian woman needed voting assistance in the booth to figure out the machine, some others who young and old, men and women, diverse and not so divers.

We have a renewed appreciation for our democracy. The right to vote and the freedom of choice we have in this nation is unparalleled the world over. Back in the day, I served my country in order to maintain these rights as did so many other 20-year-olds. Even though we did not fully understand our obligation then, we served, and we were proud.  This presidential race has stirred the conscious of the nation in a way that I have not seen since the Vietnam war. And I think it has mobilized us to serve again. There were many people at the polling place today who looked proud to vote.

There must be great joy in heaven today.  Abraham, Martin and John. Bobby. Jackie, Rosa, Thurgood, and 14-year-old Emmit Till. Harriet Tubman, James Chaney, Andrew Goodman and Michael Schwerner. Crispus Attucks, Frederick Douglass, Dred Scot. Paul Robeson, Lyndon Baines Johnson, Branch Rickey. So many more, so much sacrifice. 

Win or lose today for Obama, the march that began so many years ago continues and does not end here.  We await the results.